Our Love Will Never End

By: Angelique Burgit

 

 

Summary: After the leaps are over Sam and finally comes home in the year 2002 he finds out his world was turned upside down and his life is about to get more complicated when he remembers in the timeline he has come back to his best friend and him have been married for 10 years, but will they be able to handle whatever the future may throw at them?

 

Disclaimers: The Characters in Quantum leap do not belong to me. I don’t mean to infringe upon the copyrights of anyone who was involved in the making of the show.

 

Warnings: M/M Slash, cursing, death of both characters

 

 

Al:

 

            After Sam had come home I was overjoyed but I could tell from the look he gave me he didn’t remember me as anything more than his best friend. Bena told me he would remember most of it in time but not to help him remember. He had to do that on his own and the more I thought about it the more I thought I should pack my things up and move back on the base. I figured why tempt fate and besides if he didn’t remember then he could go on with his life and find some one younger for a mate. There were plenty of men and women who would gladly take my place. I didn’t want to leave him but I figured it would be for the best at least for the time being. If he remembered then I’d have to deal with it when the time came. In all the years I waited for Sam when this timeline came I have never once cheated on him and I won’t until our oath of love and devotion is officially dissolved. If he wants me to stay with him I probably will because I love him too much not too.

 

            Who knows if he remembers he might not want me back anyway. I’m not the 58-year-old man he decided to marry 10 years ago. I’ve gotten older and fatter even though I still look pretty good for my age. I’m 18 years older then him and the odds are I’ll die way before him. I may still have one hell of a sex drive but I’m still 68 years old no matter how much I try to deny it.

 

            After I packed everything up I left our home and came back to the base. I was unpacking my stuff when I glanced down at my wedding ring and just started to sob. I curled up on the bed in a fetal position clinging to our wedding picture. I didn’t want to loose Sam but unless he wanted me as his mate still I wasn’t going to try and keep him. I don’t want him to stay with me out of gilt or pity. I wanted him to make the choice out of love. I was so worn out by crying that I fell asleep for a couple of hours.

 

 

 

Sam:

 

            God it was good to be back and be able to feel Al instead of just seeing him. As soon as I saw him I hugged him so tightly he was having a hard time breathing. I looked at him and smiled. I saw a shadow cross his eyes for a second and then it was gone. He soon started acting like it hadn’t even happened and I soon fell into his defense tactic. After a while he left telling me he had things to do so I let him go and told him I’d see him later. As he left I had a feeling I was missing something about him in my mind but I couldn’t place it yet. I knew it had to be the Swiss cheese effect on my brain.

 

            They eventually let me go home and the house was the same as I remembered. I could feel there was something missing though but I let it go for the time being because I knew it would come back eventually. I looked in my bedroom and noticed there were two dressers and closets. I looked in them and noticed that one of each were empty. Now that was very puzzling to me because I don’t really remember having two to begin with but I wondered why basically half of the things in the room would be empty. Then I caught sight of a wedding band on my hand along with an Annapolis ring on the pinky. Obviously I was married to some one but couldn’t remember who it was or where I got the Annapolis ring from and it was really starting to worry me. I looked around for any clues that could tell me what I was looking for and found no answers except for an ashtray by the bed on the nightstand that was empty. I wondered why I had an ashtray beside the bed since I didn’t smoke unless my wife did but I can’t remember even having a wife.

 

            This went on for a month or so and I couldn’t remember anything about my marriage. I finally went to Verbena to see if I could get any answers and all she told me was to look at the symbols of my vows and I will eventually find the answers I’m looking for. I did and didn’t find any answers until I found a picture of Al and me dancing together at a nightclub. It was the only picture that was of me an Al that represented more than friendship. It was like as if it had been left by accident in a hasty retreat. That picture started a flood of answers and as I looked at it I started to remember everything. Al was wearing his black slacks and shoes, bright lapis blue circle design shirt, and his sliver fall coat. He didn’t wear the tie that went with it that night. I was wearing a pair of Dockers, loafers, cotton dress shirt and a blazer. Al always was the one to be well dressed while I liked the plainer look. I also saw he was wear the Annapolis ring I now wore. I remember that picture was taken right after we left Star Bright and right before we got engaged. Al gave me his Annapolis ring as an engagement ring which meant more to me then going out and buying me a diamond any day because of how much that ring meant to him and in order to give it to me I had to mean more to him than the ring. We had gotten married on May 20, 1992 and we both had our wedding bands inscribed with “Yours for eternity” and each of us had our names put on the others wedding band.

 

            I ran to Bena’s office and demanded answers. She finally realized what I was ranting about when I mentioned the wedding date and everything I remembered. When I got very frustrated I blurt out, “”Why didn’t Al tell me, Bena??!!”

 

            She calmly replied, “I see you remember about your marriage now. I told Al not to tell you and let you remember on your own. I take responsibility for it, Sam.”

 

            I replied, “When and why did Al move out of our home?”

 

            She sighed and said, “He moved out the day you came home, Sam. As for why you’ll have to talk to him.”

 

            I stormed out of her office and went to find Al. I eventually found him walking into his office. I yelled, “Albert Francis Calavicci!! We have to talk! NOW!!!” I saw him cringe and nod while there were people staring at us. At the time I didn’t care who the hell knew anything. He wasn’t getting out of this one that easily.

 

 

Al:

 

            It had been a month since Sam had stopped leaping and I thought maybe he might not remember about us. I was walking into my office when I heard Sam yelling at me to talk with him. I knew he was pissed because he never uses my whole first name let alone my whole name unless he is and of course the tone of voice he used kinda gave me a clue too. I nodded and went into my office to wait for the inevitable and sat down at my desk. When he came in he slammed the door and I calmly asked, “What do you need to talk about, Sam?”

 

            Sam replied, “Why the Hell did you move out of our home, Al??! And whom did you decide to shack up with?? Some long legged blonde floozy with big casabas?? How long have you been cheating on me, Al?? Since I jumped into the Accelerator? Dammit, Al! I trusted you!”

 

            I can take a lot of abuse before I blow my top but being accuse of running around on him just pushed me to the limit. I was pissed and screamed, “Samuel John Beckett Calavicci, Sit your ass down and shut up! I can’t believe you! You come into my office and accuse me of cheating on you before you even let me say one fucking word. I’m a patient man but you have gone to far. For your information I have not cheating on you for the 14 years that we have been a couple let alone the 10 that we’ve been married! I love you too much to just fuck up our relationship because I want to sleep with some long legged bimbo with big casabas. I’m horny, NOT stupid.”

 

            He then shouted, “Well where the Hell have you been living all month, Al??!!

 

            I shouted back, “I moved back into my old quarters on that base, dumb ass! I have been totally alone and celibate for you since you jumped into that goddamn accelerator! But if you don’t believe or trust me then fine you don't have too. I don’t care what you do and if you want a divorce than that’s fine with me. I’m too old to give a damn and besides you would probably be better off finding some one your own age to marry. Who need a 68 year old, womanizing fat man like me around anyway. I’d only embarrass you and cause trouble for you. I knew it when I didn’t see any recognition in your eyes for a month that you didn’t want me as your spouse anymore.” There I had said it and gotten it over with. I went to sit on my couch and wait for his reply even though I didn’t want to hear it.

 

            I watched as Sam’s face turned from one of anger to one of guilt and hadn’t wanted that to happen but I should have realized it would. Sam was famous for his guilt trips and blaming himself for everything that went wrong. He was very quiet when he spoke again, “God, Al. I’m sorry. I don’t even know why I did that. I should have known better. I guess all the timelines that are mixed up in my head haven’t sorted out yet. I remembered you used to run around a lot in the other timelines and I guess I just figured it was the same here. Please forgive me, Al? I’ll find a way to make it up to you.” He had knelt in front of me between my legs and was lightly touching my groin with his hand. He was also giving me his puppy dog eyes.

 

            I swallowed an replied, “Look, Sam. I’m not mad anymore and I forgive you but I don’t want you stay with me out of pity or guilt. It wouldn’t feel right for me. If you don’t want to be with me anymore then I can handle that.”

 

            Sam replied, “I love you, Al. What would make you think I would stay because of guilt or pity?”

 

            I answered, “I’m not likely to find another mate that will want me, Sam. I know the way your mind works a lot of the time, kid.”

 

            Sam said, “OK. Then tell me why I wouldn’t want you then.”

 

            I smiled weakly and replied, “Look at me, Sam. Just take a good look. I’m 18 years older than you are and will probably die before you, gotten fatter, and you have to admit I’m not the best mate you can find. I know you’d be able to find another man or woman to take my place that’s closer to your age and better looking.”

 

            As I got up and went over to my desk with my back turned to him I felt him come up behind me and wrap his arms around my waist. He replied, “Jeez, Al. You think that would stop me from loving you? Then you are vain. Look, Al. I knew you were 18 years older than me when we got married and I still married you, right? When your time comes we’ll deal with it then but until then I want to spend all the time I can with you. I want to stay with you because I love you. I never could pity you. In fact sometimes I envy you because of how much energy you have at the age you are. In my eyes you are the best mate for me. Hell, you were always taking care of me and making me go to bed when I’d stay up to late with Ziggy. Not only are you a good lover and my best friend but you are also always looking out for me and there when I need you. You are all I could ever ask for in a mate and more. Why would I ever want to leave you for some one else? I don’t ever want to lose you as long as we’re alive, Love.”

 

            I felt him start kissing that back of my neck and rubbing my belly with his hand. I heard him say, “Oh and by the way. I think you look cute with a little meat on your bones, Al. I have always liked men a little on the heavy side so I’m not going to be bothered by you having a belly. In fact I could think of some things I’d like to do.”

 

            I started to blush and felt myself getting aroused. I gently broke the embrace before I got to involved to stop. Sam led me over to my couch and kneeled between my legs again. He lightly kissed my limp dick through the fabric of my pants and put his head down in my lap. He asked, “Will you please come back home with me, Al?”

 

            I swallowed and replied, “If you still want me, Sammy. Then yes I’ll come back home with you.”

 

Sam:

 

            After I convinced Al that his late midlife crisis was unnecessary we went to his quarters and packed up his stuff to take back to our home. I noticed that even though he thought our marriage would be over he still wore his wedding band and had our wedding pictures all over his quarters. When I asked him why he still did all of that even if he thought our marriage was over he just told me that our marriage was the happiest time of his life and he wanted to remember it no matter how much it hurt too.

 

            As we packed I caught myself looking at him closely for the first time since I leaped. He had always been a small man in height and stature but he had changed since I married him. He now had gray temples and gray hair blended in with his black curly hair, a little bit of a belly that I hadn’t noticed until I put my arms around his waist and my hand bumped against the underside of it. He managed to hide it well by wearing suits for the longest time before and after I stopped leaping. Personally I didn’t care how big his belly got because I would still love him unconditionally. I was determined to prove to him that I love him no matter what and that I want to make him happy for as long as he is alive.

 

            After we got home and put his things away I noticed how tired he looked and told him to take a nap. He was about to argue but thought better of it although he asked me to stay with him until he fell asleep. After he changed into his pajamas I got on the bed beside him and curled up with him so my chest was against his back and my arm was across his middle. When he was asleep I got up and went shopping for groceries. When I came home I checked on him and he was still asleep so I started dinner. When dinner was almost ready he woke up. He told me honestly it wasn’t too bad but it wasn’t that great either. I wasn’t offended because I knew he was the chef of the house. He just had been so tired I didn’t want to bother him just because of dinner.

 

            After dinner we went into the living room and sat together on the sofa. I was curled up with my head on his shoulder and he was running a hand lightly up and down my back while he smoked a cigar. I really wasn’t that fond of him smoking in the house but I wasn’t about to say anything about it yet because I didn’t want to have another fight over anything today. I was just happy to have him back again even with the cigars. I was right about the ashtray in the bedroom being his and got for him before I sat down with him on the couch. I looked up at him and when he realized I was watching him he looked at me. When our eyes met I realized that I had always gotten lost in his eyes since the first time we met. Al lightly kissed me on the lips and gave me a hug. He asked, “Whatcha thinking about, Sammy?”

 

            I blushed and replied, “I was just thinking about how I used to always get lost in your eyes and still do.  That and how much I love you.” I watched as he finally let his guard down and let me see how much he loved me through his expressive black eyes. Then he sighed and turned his attention back to the TV while he took another drag on his cigar. I fell asleep in his embrace and wasn’t woken up until I felt him move. I asked, “Are you all right, Al?”

 

            I looked up at him and he looked at me. I saw a guilty look in his eyes when he quietly said, “Jeez. I’m sorry, Sammy. I didn’t mean to wake you up. I was just trying to find a more comfortable position.” I sat up and let him move around until he was comfortable again. I caught a glimpse at the clock and saw it was 2:00 in the morning. I said, “I’m sorry, Al. I didn’t know it was so late. Have you gotten any sleep while you were sitting here with me?”

 

            He smiled and replied, “I nodded off for a few minutes, Sam. It’s not easy for me to fall asleep sitting up normally.”

 

            I nodded and replied, “If you want to we can go to bed now. I would have asked earlier than this but I unfortunately fell asleep on you.” He smiled and we got up and went to get ready for bed.

 

Al:

 

            While I was finishing my cigar Sam fell asleep. I was so happy that he wanted me back and still loved me that I stayed in that position letting him sleep for hours. I lightly ran my hand up and down his head until I nodded off to sleep for a while with my feet propped up on our coffee table. But eventually the pain in my right side became too much to put up with and I had to change positions. When I did I woke Sam up and eventually he said we should go to bed. I agreed and he went to change while I got off the couch and tried not to show the pain I was feeling but I couldn’t help it and finally I had to put my hand there. When Sam saw me he asked what was bothering me. I just told him nothing and got into bed as carefully as possible. When we were in bed he had me cornered and insisted I tell him what was wrong. I finally told him, “IF you must know, Sam. It’s my right side and my back. I can’t stay in a position that’s uncomfortable like that for as long as I did without having my back act up and start to hurt like hell. It’s nothing serious and I’m not an invalid. Now can we please get some sleep?”

 

            When I turned onto my side with my back facing him I felt him spoon up behind me and get comfortable. He finally replied, “Look, Al. I’m sorry if I upset you but I’m here to help you and love you. In order to do that I need to know what is bothering you both physically and emotionally and everything about your health. Besides I am your doctor and I’d find out sooner or later anyway.” While he was doing all of this he was caressing my belly and side gently.

 

            I told him, “I’m sorry I snapped at you, Sam. I’ve just been alone for so long I need to get used to having some one around that cares again. Besides you know how stubborn I am about having some one take care of me when I am totally capable of doing it myself.” He nodded against the back of me head and I rolled over onto my back. I startled him but he recovered and put his head on my shoulder after I said, “It’s all right, Sammy. I’ll live and besides I want to hold you anyway. It’ll hurt a little but the pain will go away. Now c’mere all ready before I pull you over here.” He did and put an arm across my middle and his hand wondered up under my pajama top and started to caress me on my skin. After a while I fell asleep and didn’t wake up until I felt Sam thrashing around on the bed. I got up and sat on his hips while I shook him with all my might, screaming his name for him to wake up. Finally he did but unfortunately before he realized who I was he had managed to throw me onto the floor and my head landed hard against the hard wood floor. I vaguely heard him call my name a few times and then a very pained cry before I blacked out. When I came back to the real world I was on the bed and Sam was sitting beside me holding my hand.

 

            He squeezed my hand and said, “God, Al. I’m sorry. I wouldn’t have done that if I had realized soon enough it was you and not the person from my nightmare. That smack on the noggin gave you a slight concussion and you need to rest. I’ll be right here incase we need to get you to as hospital but I don’t think there will be anything to worry about because of it being a minor one. You just go back to sleep and we’ll talk in the morning.” He lightly kissed me on my forehead, cheeks and lips before he lay back down next to me and I drifted off to sleep.

 

            When I woke up the next morning Sam had a leg thrown over my legs and an arm across my middle holding me tightly to him. I ran my fingers lightly through his hair. When he woke up I said, “Good morning, Sammy.” He blushed and said the same to me. After a few minutes he propped himself up on an elbow and looked at me with that goofy grin of his. I asked, “What?”

 

            When he finally replied he was quiet. He said, “Well. I was just thinking of how happy I am to have you as my mate, Al. I’m very glad you changed your mind about being to old for me. Personally sometimes I find it a little hard to keep up with your sex drive.” I gave him a look of annoyance and then went to get up.

 

Before I could though he grabbed a hold of me and passionately kissed me and wrapped his arms around me. I automatically reacted and answered the kiss and caresses with some of my own. Soon I was hard and horny and could tell Sam was the same way. I felt him start to unbutton my pajama top and took hold of his hand to stop him. He looked at me and smiled while caressing my cheek with his other hand. He then proceeded to give me slow small kisses until I was ready to let him undress me. Finally I gave up and let him unbutton my top and as soon as he had he started to caress my sides and back. He gently moved us back to lay on our sides on the bed without even pausing in his ministrations. He maneuvered us so that I was lying on my back and started to kiss his way down my body. He kissed and sucked on my neck, chest, nipples, and belly and was driving me mad with arousal. When he got to the waistband of my pajama bottoms he licked my belly and kissed the head of my erection. He eventually got my bottoms off and all that I had on were my boxers.

 

He moved back up to kiss me and I felt him caressing my hard on through my boxers and then his hand slipped in them. He was pumping me and playing with my balls. I almost came right there but I managed to roll us over so he was on his back. I know he was going to let me to do the same to him otherwise he could have easily rolled us back over so I was underneath him again. I started to do the same to him except I had a lot less barriers to go through. He was only wearing a pair of briefs and his erection was peeking out through the right side of them. I slipped my hand into his underwear and caressed his balls before I took the briefs off. I was sitting on top of him and rocking when he reached inside my boxers again and started to pump my cock again. I couldn’t help myself and I just started to buck into his hand until he stopped.

 

Sam:

 

            I loved to watch Al while he was in the mist of making love. He looks so beautiful and young. After I stopped pumping his cock he eased himself on top of my chest to catch his breath and I held him close while I waited. After a few minutes he started to kiss me again telling me he had gotten his hormones fairly under control again. One thing about Al is that he is a wonderful lover and always makes the person (man or woman) happy before he’ll worry about his own release. He is a very considerate lover and has always been for as long as I’ve known him. I heard him ask, “What do you want to do, Sammy?”

 

            For a couple minutes I didn’t know what he meant until I remembered he asked that same question the first time he entered me. I caressed his cheek and replied softly, “I want you inside of me. I want us to be one again, Al.” He nodded and got the lubricant from in the nightstand drawer. He took off his boxers and came back over to me. He kissed and distracted me while he prepared me with his fingers. When he thought I was ready he turned me so that my back faced him. He took it very slow and as gently as possible. When he was totally in me I felt him stop and wait until I had adjusted. He was caressing me and kissing that back of my neck while he waited. I nodded telling him I was ready. Eventually I was on my stomach while Al made love to me. I will admit that from it being so long since we were together it did hurt a little but the pain was worth the pleasure that washed over me knowing we belonged to each other again for the first time in years.

 

            I felt Al’s whole body shiver and release inside me, causing me to come right after him. We stayed there for a few minutes regaining our strength. Al went to roll off of me and pull out but I tightly held onto his arm. He seemed to have understood me because he didn’t pull out but he did manage to get us both on our sides without pulling out and wrapped an arm around my waist. I heard him ask, “What’s the matter, Sammy?”

 

            I took hold of the hand that was caressing me and laced my hand in his while I said, “Well. I just kinda like the feel of you inside me, Al, and I want it to last as long as it can. You fit so well inside me that I wish we could stay like this forever.” I felt his hand tighten around mine and he put his head down on my pillow with me.

 

            He finally replied, “All right, Sammy. It doesn’t bother me as long as I’m not in a hurry. As you might remember that normally whenever we make love in the morning one of us is usually in a hurry. Personally I’d love to be inside you for eternity but eventually we’ll have to go to our jobs. I feel the same way you do, love. I’m well aware of the eternal aspect of time whether I want to be or not. I have no idea how long I’ll be with you but I’ll try my hardest to make you as happy as possible before I die.” He hugged me and after a while I heard him start to snore and had to smile. I forgot that he snores like a loud purring cat, which I always found kinda cute in a way. I kept my fingers laced in his and drifted off to sleep with him.

 

Al:

 

            When I woke up again I felt my limp cock was still inside of Sam and remembered we made love for the first time in years. God I felt sore but very peaceful and blissful. I felt our hands entwined and I really smiled for the first time since Sam came home from leaping. I looked at the clock on the nightstand and saw that it was noon. I gently pulled out of Sam and heard a whimper as I did. I felt a little guilty but I knew eventually I had too get my old lazy ass out of bed and make something to eat for us. I took a nice hot shower, put on my bathrobe and house slippers, and went about cooking something to eat.

 

I decided to make breakfast since we hadn’t eaten anything yet today. I normally don’t eat anything in the morning but I knew Sam wouldn’t be happy with me if I didn’t from now on. He had started making me eat breakfast when we got involved by dragging me out to eat with him. So there started the morning ritual of eating breakfast together every morning. I had stopped that after he leaped and went back to the old coffee and a cigar ritual because I didn’t have time in the morning to make anything to eat.

 

I got so thin that Bena used to drag me to the cafeteria and con me into eating anything from a donut to a muffin because I looked so sickly from not eating anything. As I thought about it she basically became my “wife” while my real spouse was gone. Sam always acted like a worried mother hen with me. When he used to do that it used to make me angry but after he leaped I found I missed him worrying about me.

 

I made scrambled eggs, sausage links, toast, and freshly squeezed orange juice for us. I also made myself a pot of coffee and Sam a pot of Orange Spice tea. I needed my coffee to wake up in the morning because I never was a morning person. Sam was an early bird and by time I managed to pull my tired rear out of bed he had normally been up for a couple of hours. It drove me nuts that even after a night of making love until way into morning he was still looked fresh as a daisy and I looked like Hell. He always teased me about it constantly.

 

He was up and showered by time breakfast was finished and walked into the kitchen wearing his bathrobe. I knew he always wore his briefs under his robe like I wore my boxers. We ate in silence and I wondered what was wrong. Finally I asked, “Sammy? Did I do something to upset you? IF I did I am sorry.”

 

He looked up at me and smiled as he replied, “No, Al. You didn’t do anything wrong. I was just lost in my thoughts. Besides why would you think you did something wrong?”

 

I sighed and answered, “God, Sam. You know how my mind works. I must be the most insecure SOB on the planet. I thought I did something wrong because you didn’t even say one word to me since you got up and I thought somehow I had managed to inadvertently piss you off. Hell, I thought you leaped into that damn accelerator because I had done something wrong. My fears were more justified when Donna showed up as your wife after you got her back together with her father. I thought you really didn’t want me anymore. That’s why when you didn’t remember we were married for ten years I moved out of here and to the only home I remembered being in for any length of time through my whole time with you. I thought it would be easier if you just forgot all about us being anything more than friends. That way you could find some one closer to your age and if you picked a woman you could have a family. I can’t give you any kids, Sam. Hell I can’t even give a woman any kids. I wanted to have kids but I never could. I’ve been infertile as long as I can remember so 20 years ago I gave up trying to have a family. When I met you I never planned to get married again to anybody no matter how much I loved them but you somehow managed to get through to my heart like cupid’s arrow and after that I was a goner when it came to you. I would beat the shit out of anyone who made fun of you, hurt you or hit you. If I couldn’t beat them I would die trying. That kinda clued me in to the fact that I had fallen in love with you and against my brain’s better judgment I asked you to marry me. The only thing that kept me going and alive was the fact that you still needed me when you were leaping. Jeez, listen to me. I’m rambling and not making any sense.”

 

I got up and went over to the window and looked outside. I rub my hand across my face and leaned forward against the windowsill. After a few minutes I felt a pair of arms wrap around my waist and hold me close. Sam said, “No, Al. You had to get it out and beside I understand why you did what you did. I had no idea about Donna and I am truly sorry you had to go through that. I do want you to remember one thing, Al. No matter what happens I’ll always love you no matter what. I would give my life for yours any day. If I had to ruin my marriage to Donna then I’d do it. If I had to I would give up everything even my career to stay with you. You are my spouse and no matter what you always will be. I know you don’t think you deserve to be loved or have anyone who cares let alone take care of you when you get to old to do it yourself but you’re wrong, Al. You may not look like much to yourself or other people because you’re 68, short, heavy, have gray hair, and a lot of other things but you are loving, caring, compassionate to those you love and are everything to me.  No matter how much you try to hurt me to get me to leave you’ll never get rid of me. I’m here to stay with you, love you, take care of you, and make you happy as long as you are alive on this earth. I love you very much and would never get sick of you and not want you anymore.”

 

I haven’t been in the middle of something that mushy in a long time and broke down sobbing. I hated when we got mushy like that because no matter how much I try to hide my emotions, I really am an emotional person. After I had calmed down some I managed to talk between breaths. I said, “I’m sorry, Sammy. I’m becoming an old sentimental fool.”

 

He turned me around and bent his head and lightly kissed my lips a couple of times. He brush my tears away with his thumbs and replied, “That’s all right, Al. I love you more when you let your emotions show. After all I am a very emotional and sentimental person myself.” I weakly smiled at him and kissed him back before I went to clean up from breakfast.

 

Sam:

 

            Now I understood why Al had been acting the way he had been since I came back from leaping. I forgot how personally he took some things. I was determined to try and make it up to him for all the misery he went through while waiting for me to come home to him. I went into the living room while Al cleaned up the dishes and started to think about how we had decided who would be the domestic partner and who would be the worker. We eventually decided that Al would be the domestic one of us even though right now he was still working. He can clean; cook, is a passionate environmentalist, worries about his looks, and is the smaller one of us. He has a bunch of feminine qualities that fit the role he agreed to take even though there is no doubt he is a man. We just agreed it would be easier if he took the domestic role since I was younger than he was and didn’t have to retire anytime soon like he would have too. He wanted to be the bread winner and take care of me but he had agreed since I was 18 years younger than him it would be better if I took on the role.

 

            One thing I can say about Al is that he has one hell of a stubborn streak in him but he will bow out if he can understand the logic of what the other person is saying. When I first saw him beating the shit out of that vending machine I knew he needed a friend to bring him out of that black hole he had sunk himself into. He was a very angry, mean, rude, and downright uncaring SOB when I first met him. I managed to get him to let me take care of the nasty cut he had on his hand and got him talking some. I knew he was drunk off of his ass but at the time he needed a friend and not some one to chew him a new asshole. After some time I managed to win his trust by siding with him when they tried to throw him out of the Star Bright Project. I also took full responsibility for his actions for there on out. IF they wanted to get rid of him they would have to get rid of me too. He had called out to me after the meeting and asked, “Why did you just save my ass in there? Everybody else has wanted to get me off of this fucking project for a long time. You took a big chance by doing what you did, Dr. Beckett. You just sacrificed your own career for an old drunken, washed up, man who should have been thrown out a long time ago. Why?”

 

            I looked at him and replied, “Because Admiral Calavicci, I think you’re worth loosing my job over. I don’t know why but I have a feeling about you. IF you want to keep our Asses as part of this project I’d suggest changing a few things about yourself. For example stop drinking and being a total asshole and maybe people will like you more. I put my cards on the table and now it’s your turn.” I then walked away from him and went back to my quarters.

 

The next day when I ran into him he was sober and trying to be pleasant to be around. We had lunch together and as I got to know him better over time I learned that under neither the man I met months ago lies a very loving and caring man.  That was when we started calling each other by our first names. I soon felt myself falling in love with him and when he first called me Sammy without thinking and apologized I told him, “I like the way you call me Sammy, Al.” He agreed not to stop calling me Sammy.

 

As time went on he became a little more liked and we were totally inseparable. Finally one night he took me back to his quarters and said, “Look, Sammy. I don’t know how to tell you this but if your bothered by it tell me and I won’t say anything about it again, OK? Well you know I love women and have had five wives because of it but I like men too. Although I lean toward the fairer sex, and I guess I would be considered mildly bisexual or more straight then gay. Jeez what I’m trying to say is you are that one in a million men that got my attention. If your not offended or if you’re interested would you be willing to go out with me?” He waited patiently although I could tell he was worried I knock him out on his ass and never want to anything to do with him again.

 

I smiled and replied, “Of course I’m interested, Al. I never told you but I’m gay and I’ve been praying that you would be interested in me.” I wrapped my arms around his waist and hugged him. He shyly brought my head down with his hand and kissed me on the lips. After a while he got surer and bolder with his kisses. We stopped before it went to far though and after he got ready to go out we went back to my quarters so I could.

 

We had a lovely night and went to a bunch of gay clubs and danced all night. That was when that picture of us was taken. Who could have known that at that moment we had started something that would last a lifetime? We didn’t consummate our relationship for about a year because I didn’t want to just be a one-night stand to Al. Then one night when he came to get me right after the Star Bright Project was finished he came in and sat on the sofa waiting for me. When I was ready he led me over to the couch and got down on one knee. He said, “Sammy, I’ve been thinking about this a long time and finally made a decision. I’m probably an old fool for even considering this after all the hell I’ve gone through in the past but will you marry me?”

 

I agreed rather gleefully and he removed his Annapolis ring off of his finger and put it on my pinky. I said, “I can’t take this ring, Al. You love this ring. What if I lost it?”

 

He smiled and replied, “Yes you can, Sammy. I love you and am willing to give you my ring to prove how much I love you. If you loose it so what? I realize now that all I need is you and if I ever loose you I wouldn’t want to live anymore.”

 

I started to cry and wrapped my arms around him to hold him. I whispered, “I love you too, Al, and I’ll cherish both the ring and you for as long as we live.” After a while I let him go and helped him up from his kneeling position. I realized now that even back then he felt old even though he acted young. That night we made love for the first time and it hurt but it felt so good to be one with him. Soon after I bought him a gold saint medallion and a gold chain to wear it on. I noticed that he still wears it under his clothes and never takes it off. When I asked him about it he informed me he had been wearing it since the day I gave it to him 13 years ago with the exception of cleaning it of course.  That medallion was the only link he had to me since I leaped and he cherishes it as much as I cherish his ring. When he got us PQL we were married as a kinda of celebration. He figured it would be the best time to do it since we wouldn’t have time to do it while we were busy with the project. He promised that he would try to get us a better wedding sometime in the future when we weren’t so busy.

 

After we were married we had 4 years of bliss before I had to jump into the accelerator and wound up with a Swiss cheesed brain. I didn’t remember anything about me and Al and I know that it hurt like hell for him to have a lover and spouse who doesn’t even remember him or what the mean to each other. Every time I got angry on those leaps I would take it out on him and I could tell I hurt him.  I know it hurt even more when I used his insatiable sex drive and his penchant for alcohol against him. Anything from his past hurt but those two things hurt the most since he gave them both up for me. Even though in some of the time lines he had a lot of different lovers including Tina who is married to Gooshie in this time. He remembers all the time lines like I do and only cares about the one we are in now because we are happier now than we’ve ever been.

 

I was brought back to the present by a hand on my shoulder. I looked up at Al and smiled. I motioned for him to sit on my lap and after he was comfortable he wrapped his arms around my neck. He asked, “Whatcha thinking about, Sammy?”

 

I kissed him lightly on the lips and replied, “Oh nothing really. I was just thinking about you and how much you’ve changed since we met at Star Bright. And I never could be happier than I am now, Al. I’m glad we became friends even though you were an asshole in the beginning. But if we both weren’t so stubborn we probably wouldn’t be where we are now and as happy as we are.” He nodded his understanding and leaned back into my embrace. I finally decided to ask, “Al? I don’t want to make you mad but I can’t think of any other way to ask this. Could you try and quite smoking?” He immediately sat up and looked at me.

 

He replied calmly, “Why? If it’s the fact that I’m smoking in the house then I’ll go outside to smoke.”

 

I sighed and said, “No. It doesn’t have anything to do with you smoking in the house. I just don’t want to loose you any sooner then necessary if it’s possible. All I’m asking is that you try, Al. I’m not asking for guarantees. Only that you give it the old college effort.” He frowned slightly and then slowly nodded.

 

He said, “All right, Sam. I’ll try and stop smoking if you promise me one thing. That if I can’t do it you’ll never mention it again but if I can’t stop entirely I’ll try to smoke less than I am now, OK?” I nodded and we shook on it before we leaned back against the couch again. He moved around some until he was sitting on the couch next to me with his head on my shoulder. He was rubbing his hand gently up and down my chest and I was running my fingers through his black curly hair. I heard him sigh and cuddle closer to me. After a while I heard him starting to snore and smiled to myself. I nodded off sometime later and when I woke up Al wasn’t leaning on me anymore. I got up and went looking for him.

 

Al:

 

            When I woke up from my little nap I got dressed, went outside and sat in the rocker on the porch. I was starting to feel old and tired of the rat race. I rocked back and forth with my arms wrapped around my chest feeling suddenly all alone and scared. I was becoming a bloody nervous wreck and I hated the idea of it. I was lost in my thoughts when Sam found me and startled me like a deer looking into headlights. He knelt in front of me and put both hands on my knees and asked, “What’s wrong, Al? You look like your ready to bolt away from me. What happened to make you like this?”

 

            I stood up and put some distance between us but kept my arms where they were and replied, “Life, Sam. It’s nothing you did. It’s me personally and somehow I have to learn to deal with all of my problems.”

 

            Sam came to stand beside but gave me my space until I was ready to be close again and said, “Al, You’re not alone anymore you know. No matter how much you think you are. You have me and I love you more than anything. I’m willing to help you through whatever it is you need to deal with if you’ll let me. When we got married we took an oath to help each other in every way possible but how can I help and be there for you if I don’t even know what is bothering you? Please don’t shut me out, Al.”

 

            I snapped, “I’ll be fine, Sam. If I want your help I’ll ask for it, OK??!” I then stormed into the house and into our bedroom. I slammed the door and fell on the bed and started to cry. I was so angry. Angry with myself for getting old and useless and angry with Sam for wanting to help me when I didn’t even think he could. I knew he meant well but I just needed to vent and Sam got the brunt of it. After I calmed down I immediately started to regret blowing up at him. Deep in my heart I knew he was only trying to help and I yelled at him for it. Automatically my old defense mechanism had kicked in and I hurt some one I love. I used to use it all the time so that no one would ever want to be close to me and I wouldn’t have to worry about being hurt by anyone. I got off the bed and went looking for Sam to apologize and couldn’t find him anywhere. After two hours I was starting to panic and get really worried that either e left me after all or something happened to him. Finally I heard the front door open and ran into the other room yelling, “Where the hell have you been, Sammy??!”

 

            He just sat on the couch and replied, “Well, I figured you needed some time alone so I went to the project and did some work. I’m sorry if I worried you, Al. I just lost track of time.” I finally calmed down and quietly excused myself to go make dinner. I should have realized that would be where he had gone. After dinner I took care of the dishes and went into the parlor and sat down to watch some TV to try and unwind. Sam was standing by the wall and I motioned for him to come over and sit with me. He was wary at first and then he curled up next to me. He gently pulled me over so that my head rested on his shoulder and his own body cushioned my body. I played with the buttons on his shirt and said, ‘Sammy? I’m sorry I snapped at you earlier. I just have too much on my mind and I don’t think you could help me right now. It’s my head that’s screwed up and I have to figure out how to deal with how I’m feeling now that I’m old. I have to face it that I’m getting to be an old man.”

 

I heard him make a sound that told me he understood and felt him running his fingers through my hair. Sam had always loved to play with my hair and after I got used to him doing it I found it soothing when he did do it. I had grown it out some the last couple of months so that it looks a little more like his in fullness only I don’t have it to my shoulders. The length is in how my hair is cut and on top of that it’s been so long since I had hair longer then the typical military style and I forgot how curly it is naturally. The Navy wasn’t happy about my change in hairstyle but they shut up about it seeing that I’m not actually working with them anymore even though I’m still part of the Navy. I plan on retiring real soon anyway because I’m getting to old for the shit I have to go through with them.

 

            After a while I looked up at him and he weakly smiled at me. I kissed him lightly on the lips, got up, and started doing things around the house to keep myself busy. Hell, I was in such a nervous mood I cleaned the house from top to bottom, reorganized the cabinets and made lunch in 2 hours. Sam was looking at me like I had been possessed or something. I would have loved to curl up to him but I just couldn’t sit still. I know I was starting to worry my mate but I had to keep moving otherwise I would go nuts. That promise I made to Sam was taking its toll to because I was trying my hardest not to smoke but I was loosing the battle. Damn I wanted a cigar but I forced myself to do other things to keep busy. Finally evening came and we went to bed. We made wild, passionate love and then fell asleep.

 

            As the week progressed I was ready to loose my sanity and was ready to kill anyone near me who had a cigar. Nicotine withdrawal is hell believe me. My temper was also very short and I would blow up at anybody who looked at me cross-eyed. Everyone was trying to avoid me because Sam had told them why I was acting that way and took all the blame for my behavior. Sam tried to be as patient as possible until after 2 weeks of hell with me he told me he’d had enough and gave me my cigars back. I had made a promise to him but he told me he gave up because I was hell to live with and work with and if I didn’t mellow out I was going to drive him nuts not to mention the staff at PQL. I did manage to keep the other end of my bargain and went down to smoking only one cigar a day instead of about 4 like I used too. Things started to go back to normal around our house and PQL until the government decided to shut us down. Sam was pissed and I wasn’t surprised. They had threatened many times to me about shutting us down with or without Sam home. I was just very glad Sam was home and I didn’t have to worry about him never coming back. I fought them then and I tried to fight them again but this time they would not budge in their decision. That’s when I had enough and told them not only was I retiring but also I have been married to Sam for 10 years. The looks on their faces were priceless. They looked like they had just heard that we going to be bombed by England. God that felt good to give them the shell shock of a lifetime. I then passionately kissed Sam in front of the whole review board and Sam was both pleased and embarrassed as hell. I just smiled and waltzed out of there holding Sam’s hand and happy as hell. Let them put that in their pipe and smoke it.

 

That night when Sam and me went home I was in a very good mood for a change. In fact we made love until 4:00 in the morning and for a change I had worn Sam out. I wanted to keep going but he couldn’t take it anymore. I grinned at him and relented. We fell asleep in each other’s arms and slept in late.

 

Sam:

 

            I haven’t seen Al this happy for a long time. By time I convinced him to go to sleep it was already 4:00 in the morning and we had made love at least 6 to 8 times and I was worn out. I didn’t want to stop but I couldn’t stay awake any longer. I couldn’t believe he had not only retired from the Navy but also told them we were married for 10 years and passionately kissed me in front of the whole review board. As soon as we got home he was all over me and I knew he must be horny as hell. I wasn’t wrong either and never has he made love to me as might as he did tonight. I fell asleep in Al’s arms and was very content.

 

            When I woke up the next morning Al was caressing my hair with his hand. I lifted my head up and kissed him on the lips. He just smiled at me and asked, “Hey, Sammy? Wanna go dancing tonight?” I looked at him like he had come from another planet and smiled as I got a mischievous plan in my head. I nodded and ran my hand down his side and up the inside of his thigh. Apparently my lover wanted to live life to the fullest and somehow I would give him what he wants.

 

            I replied, “Sure, Why not. That’s of course if we’re up to it by tonight.” I gave him the cat-that-ate-the-canary smile and started to tease him in all the places I knew would drive him wild. The last thing I heard from him was, “Ooh Boooy!” When we were too tired to make love anymore Al put his head on my shoulder and wrapped an arm around my waist. I could tell he was nodding off to sleep again and lightly ruffled his already messed up hair. He sleepily looked up at me and smiled. He kissed me on the lips and put his head back down on my shoulder again.

 

            After a few minutes I thought he had gone to sleep when he said, “God, Sammy. I feel so relaxed and sleepy.”

 

            I chuckled and replied, “I never thought I’d see the day when I could wear out Albert Calavicci through sex. I remember you telling me you’re always ready to make love.” He just made a quiet noise and in a few minutes he was fast asleep. He looked so peaceful and a lot younger when he slept. He has aged well for a man who’s been through everything he had to go through and didn’t look lie he was 68 years old. He looked like he was in his 50’s. Given the chance Al can be a lot of things that you never would think he was capable of like being monogamous, staying married for 14 years, showing you how much he loves you. He never was good at saying “I love you” but he has gotten a little better over the years we’ve been together. He’s the type of person who relies on actions more than words and I’ve learned to accept that to an extent but I think even he knows when I need to hear him say how much he loves me. He also is very sensitive even though he won’t show or say that you hurt him except you can always tell by his lack of conversation and the look in his eyes. Every time I hurt him I kick myself about it because I use thing he has told me in love and friendship to hurt him. I hate myself after that because under neither his womanizing, grouchy, and usually calm exterior is a very sensitive, loving, caring, sweet man who just wants to be loved. Al had been searching all his life for some one to love him for who he is on the inside instead of the outside and he had finally found the soul mate he had been searching for after 5 failed marriages.

 

            I felt Al snuggle closer to me in sleep and tightened the arm I had around his shoulders. He sighed and relaxed again. After a while I dozed off and joined him in sleep. I was woken up by a tight grip on my arm and my eyes snapped open. Al had a death grip on my arm and was mumbling in his sleep. I realized there was a high note of panic in his voice and tried to shake him awake. When he finally did wake up his panic filled eyes met mine and after a few minutes I saw relief flood his features. He was sweating like hell and he rolled onto his back to try and compose himself. I asked him what the nightmare was about and he simply replied, “Nam.” Immediately I turned pale and understood why he was so panicked. I curled up beside him and held him close while he calmed down. After a few minutes he wrapped an arm around my shoulder and said, “I’ll be all right now, Sammy.”

 

            I replied, “God, Al. If you need some one to talk to I’m willing to listen. I went through some things like that during the leaps although not as torturous but I do have an idea of what you went through. I’m also willing to learn if it will help me understand you better. I want to help but I need to know what’s going on up here first.” I lightly tapped his temple before caressing his cheek. I caressed his side with my other hand while I waited.

 

            Al said, “I know you want to help and understand more about me, Sammy, but I’m not ready. Someday I promise I’ll tell you but not now, OK?” I slowly nodded because I knew I couldn’t push him to tell me unless it was absolutely necessary because he would retreat into his shell again and it would take longer to get him out again then it was worth. I leaned down and kissed him before putting my head on his shoulder. He relaxed again but didn’t go back to sleep instead he just stayed there holding me in his arms until we both got up to take showers.

 

            After our showers Al got dressed and went to make us something to eat. I remember when I almost had to force him to eat something in the morning. His idea of breakfast was coffee and a cigar. Now that he’s cut back on smoking I noticed he gained a little more weight then he had before but that was to be expected until he got used to only smoking one cigar a day. In order not to smoke he has to keep busy and his appetite has gotten better. For a while I was worried about him because he hardly ate anything because the food at PQL never was very good. One thing I know Al will never give up is his coffee because he loves coffee more than his cigars. When I walked out to the kitchen I found him at the table with a cup of coffee waiting for me.

 

 

Al:

 

            I made us something to eat and sat at the table with a cup of coffee while I waited for Sam. I was thinking about what had happened in the bedroom after my nightmare. I know Sam only wants to help but I can’t bring myself to tell him exactly what I went through. The nightmares about Nam were replaced by nightmares of loosing Sam after he had jumped into that infernal accelerator. The dreams would consist of him not leaping before it was to late and me standing by helplessly watching him die. I’d much rather deal with the nightmares from Nam then the other ones. Sam doesn’t know half of the hell he put me through with his leaps. When we switched places on the one leap I was pissed but I deep down wished I had kept leaping because then Sam would have been safe. Every time it was a close call before Sam leaped I almost fainted with relief when he made it out in time. God listen to me I sound like a worried mother hen….or lover. That’s exactly what I am. I am worried of loosing Sam and my only chance at happiness so instead of that happening I tried to push him away from me to try and keep myself from getting hurt. All I succeeded in doing was hurting him and hating myself for it. As I felt his presence in the room and raised my head to look at him I made a decision.

 

            I said, “Sam, I need to talk to you.” When he nodded and sat down I continued, “You can be as open with our relationship as you want from now on, Sammy. I’m not in the Navy anymore and I don’t give a damn about what they think anymore. But please promise me one thing; that you’ll never leave me alone again. That’ll always be here and not in some other time or place unless I am physically with you. I was so afraid of loosing you that I unconsciously was pushing you away from me. If you had died on one of your leaps it would have killed me.”

 

            Sam stood up and stood behind me with his arms wrapped around me. He replied, “God, Al. Is that why you moved out and everything? I didn’t know. I wish I had known earlier. I’m not going anywhere from now on without you unless it’s a short business trip. I won’t ever leave you alone like that again, Al. I swear it.”

 

            I melted into his embrace and nodded in reply. I whispered, “Thank you, Sammy.” He held me tighter and we stayed like that for a little while until I remembered about the meal. We sat side by side while we ate and Sam held onto my free hand while we ate as a comforting gesture. After we ate he helped me with the dishes and then he went to do the yard work while I cleaned inside. I did laundry, ironed and a lot of the other household chores. When we got finished it was around 4:00 in the afternoon. I was going to make dinner when Sam offered to take me out for dinner instead me having to cook again. Then we could go dancing right from there. I agreed because even though I love to cook I didn’t feel like cooking at the time and we got cleaned up and changed. Sam took me to nice Italian restaurant and it was a little expensive but he didn’t care as long as I enjoyed myself. We sat across from each other and chatted about the old days. After we ate he took hold of one of my hands and I clasped my other hand over his hands. We sat there staring into each other’s eyes like we had the day we fell in love and ignored all the stares we got from the other patrons. After all it wasn’t like we were doing anything significant. When we first started dating I was the masculine counter part and Sam was the feminine. Now our role have reversed partly because I’m the older one of us so I can’t really keep working forever. Believe it or not I’m happier being the feminine half anyway because I get to cook and do a lot of the things I haven’t been able to do for years.

 

            Within a couple of hours Sam had wined and dined me and we went dancing. We went to a gay club seeing that’s the only place two men can dance together and not be stared at. We mostly danced during the slow dances and I let Sam lead because I was content just resting my head on his shoulder and following him. Unfortunately when Sam went to the bathroom a couple of the bigger guys tried to hit on me. I said, “Look you nozzles. I’m a married man and don’t want anyone else. I’m very happy with the partner I have. I’m not interested.” Then they decided to cozy up to me and try to play grab ass. God I felt like a woman because I was helpless against them because of how much bigger they were than me.

 

When I finally managed to get free I ran to the bathroom and found Sam washing his hands. He took one look at my disheveled appearance and motioned for me to come over to him. I ran into his arms and held tightly onto his shirt. Those guys had followed me and when I saw them I shrunk closer to Sam. I whispered, “They tried to pick me up and when they didn’t get what they wanted they started to molest me.” I was really acting like a woman but at the time I didn’t care.

 

I heard Sam tell them, “All right, guys. You’ve had you fun. Why don’t you leave my spouse alone and go find some other short older guy to pick on?” They all left when they realized Sam meant business. He held me tightly while I stood there tightly clutching his shirt and shaking like a leaf. He caressed my hair and I buried my face in his shirt until I could compose myself. When I finally did pull away he eased his grip but never let go. He wiped the tears from my eyes with his finger and said, “Jeez, Al. I’m sorry. I should have thought of that happening seeing that you’re smaller then many of the men in here.”

 

I replied, “It’s all right, Sam. Besides I shouldn’t have acted the way I did. I’m becoming an emotional wreck.”

 

He smiled and kissed me cheek. He replied, “Don’t worry about it, Al. You reacted the just about anybody would react after what you went through and I’m glad you came running in here to find me. I don’t want to know what might have happened if you hadn’t panicked.”

 

After a while we called it a night and went home. My feet and back were killing me but I wasn’t about to tell Sam that because that would just prove I was too old to go dancing and I love to dance. We made wild passionate love again and went to sleep.

 

On our 20th Anniversary we renewed our wedding vows in front of our friends and family. It was a wonderful day and I was so pleased that Sam loved me enough to renew our vows that I was ecstatic all day long. Hell I was the next closed thing to bouncing off the walls. We took a vacation in the tropics for a couple of weeks and had a wonderful time.

 

As the years flew by I got older and weaker. I knew I should slow down but I refused to do it until I had no choice. I got pneumonia and never fully recovered from that and then I got lung cancer. It was inoperable and I knew I was going to die and leave Sam. I wasn’t worried about myself because I always knew I would die someday. I was really worried about Sam and after almost 30 years of being my spouse I don’t know how he will react to my death. I made sure he knew I loved him as much as I could until I started going in and out of consciousness. Whenever I was conscious Sam was sitting by my bedside and holding my hand. He was with me until I took my last breath even though I wasn’t conscious I knew he was there beside me until the end.

 

 

Sam:

 

            As the years progressed I got a new job, teaching children at a local school while Al played the role of the dutiful homemaker. As Al turned 70 years old he began to slow down although he would never admit it and kept pushing himself too hard. Even his sex drive was decreasing even though he made sure we did it at least once before we went to sleep every night. I tried to get him to slow down and push himself so much but he wouldn’t do it. He eventually had no choice because he got pneumonia and almost died on me. I took a family leave from my job and when Al came home from the hospital I took care of him. He finally agreed to take an easy and not push himself into an early grave. He never really recovered physically from it but he was well enough to take care of himself and still enjoy life as long as he didn’t over do it. Al’s hair had turned almost totally gray and you could tell that he had aged. I still love him anyway and always will.

 

            On his 75th birthday I bought him a new silver cigarette lighter and had it engraved: You are my one and only true love – Sam. Al loved it and got me a gold pocket watch for my next birthday that said: I love you now and forever - Al.  We had a good time that day and I prayed I would get to have more years with him.

 

            When Al turned 78 we were celebrating our 20th anniversary and I decided we should renew our wedding vows. He was so happy that he was acting like he did when he was 58 the first time we were married. By then all of Al’s hair had turned gray and he looked older but I didn’t care because no matter how old he got or how he looked he was still my lover, spouse, best friend, and most importantly my Al. I have never been so proud and happy to have know anyone like I have been to know Al. Sometimes I wish we had known each other soon and that I hadn’t jumped into that accelerator but there wasn’t anything I could do about it now.

 

            The year Al turned 80 years old his health took a turn for the worse and he developed lung cancer. He just shrugged and told me, “Hey, I lived a good life, Sammy. I’m not afraid to die. I’m only afraid to die alone. Promise me you’ll stay with me until I’m gone.” I did promise and the next six months until Al was too weak we made love as much as we could. Then Al started to go in and out of consciousness and I stayed by his side from then on.

 

            Right before he died he said, “I want you to know I love you with all my heart and you gave me the best marriage I could ever hope for and I’ll be with you always even when you don’t know it, Sammy. Our love will never end. It will last forever as long as you never forget me it will always be with you in your heart.” I told him how I felt about him and he died in my arms 2 hours later. I cried and cried after I made the funeral arrangements. He meant everything to me and I had spent 26 years with this man as my life partner and now I didn’t know what to do without him. I was already 62 years old but I still had a while to go before I could join him. Al left me everything he owned and left me instructions on where to bury him and that there was another plot for me to be buried right next to him when the time came.

 

As time went on I met a nice lady about the age of 50 and we spent time with each other and decided to get an apartment together. We never got involved and she understood why but we were very close friends. Her name was Sally Potts. When my time came I knew I was going to die because I saw Al standing beside me bed holding his hand out for me. He looked the same way he did when I came back from leaping with the gray at his temples and wearing his light blue suit with the fancy vest, black collared white shirt and his white sneakers. I took his hand and he hugged and kissed me. He led me toward the white light and I was finally at peace and content.

 

Epilogue

 

            At the age of 85 Samuel Beckett joined Al in death. He was buried along side his life mate and he left some of his things to Sally but a lot of the money and that went to whatever friends from PQL were still alive and then to the orphanages. Sally followed his burial instructions to the letter and she stayed in the apartment that she had shared with Sam until she was too old to take care of herself.

 

            Sam and Al had left behind a legacy of love and devotion along with everything they had done for science. Al also left behind the experience of almost 50 years in the Navy. Anyone who knew them for who they were inside would tell off anyone who insulted them before they even knew them. Every year until he died Sam would but fresh flowers on Al’s grave and after Sam died either Sally or one of their PQL friends would do it for both graves. Everyone who remembered Al and Sam would smile at the thought of them. When all their friends joined them in death they may have been forgotten for who they were but they still are remembered for all their accomplishments.

 

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The End